Self Control and Self Discipline: Top Articles

You Are Not Your Mental Health

For many people, receiving a diagnosis of a mental health issue is a revelation, a kind of validation that explains the confusing symptoms they’ve endured, sometimes for years. Suddenly, the world feels a bit more manageable because now, there’s a label for their experience. For the first time in a long time, they feel understood. Take my friend, Thomas (not his real name).

Control Your Calendar (Not Your To-Do List) and Success Will Follow

Our society celebrates getting things done. Long hours, overflowing inboxes, and maxed-out calendars become badges of honor. But this relentless pursuit of output can leave us feeling drained, disconnected, and unfulfilled. We neglect the things that truly matter to us—family, personal growth, health—because tasks, not our values, dictate our schedules.

Getting Great Sleep is Much Easier Than You Think

A few years ago, I started waking up at three o’clock every morning. Over the years, I’d read many articles about the importance of rest, so I knew the research was unequivocal: Quality sleep supports cognitive performance and lowers the risk of diseases and health conditions such as type 2 diabetes, heart disease, stroke, obesity, and dementia. Knowing that, I’d toss and turn in bed, disappointed that I wasn’t following through on my plan to get seven to eight hours of shut-eye.

How to Be Lucky in Business and Life: 4 Science-Backed Principles

Something as vague and indiscernible as “luck” has no place in the business world, right? Except studies show luck can make all the difference between business success and failure. Turns out, it’s not a matter of being born lucky. You can, quite literally, make your own luck in business and in life.

How to Stop Overthinking

We all dwell on unresolved personal conflicts from time to time. Who hasn’t ruminated on a hurtful comment or unintentional harm we might have caused someone? Feeling bad about something you did, or something done to you, is human. But while it’s expected that the arguments we’ve had, the negative events we’ve experienced, and the major decisions we face haunt us, rumination can also pile on new problems.

How to Handle a Distracting Boss

See if you can relate to Sarah. She’s a software engineer who loves her job—except for her manager, Tom. To Tom, everything is a crisis worthy of interrupting Sara, even when she’s trying to focus on her work. One morning, while Sarah was coding a critical feature, Tom called and asked her to drop everything to help with an urgent report for the CMO.

Only People Who Believe in Luck Have It

Richard Branson will be the first to tell you that he’s generally a lucky person in business and life. An adrenaline junkie, he’s lived through several near-death experiences, including in the early ’70s, when he and his then-wife survived a shipwreck that no other passengers did by jumping off the boat in a storm and swimming to shore. Branson isn’t the only uber-successful person to say that luck was on their side.

Can You Think Yourself Thinner?

As a clinically obese teen, my parents were desperate to get me to a healthy weight. My mom coaxed me on a walk through our boring, middle-class Central Florida suburb every Sunday. The road we walked was paved with good intentions, but for me, it was hell: the heat and humidity, the painful chafing between my thighs, the inevitable embarrassment of applying Vaseline to said chafing. … If I was going to suffer, I would need a reward, and it had better be a good one!

Work Productivity Hacks & Tips for Today’s Workplace

Gallup’s 2023 State of the Global Workplace report highlights a stark reality: disengaged and burned-out employees are draining 9% of the world’s GDP, resulting in approximately $8.8 trillion in losses. On the other hand, engaged employees are 18% more productive and...

Why Successful People Only Get More Successful

You know those people who just seem to get more and more successful? It’s as if each success gives them momentum to achieve even more. Bridgit Mendler is a former Disney child star turned singer, lawyer, and entrepreneur. Amor Towles was a very successful investment banker for two decades and then became a very successful author. Well, there’s a secret to their success, and no, it’s not the obvious money, privilege, and social class (although those certainly count for something). It’s not even their natural talent.

How to Become an Indistractable Reader

When I was growing up, you couldn’t pay me to read a book about self-help or business. Now, I read between 60 to 80 books every year. A good non-fiction book is the distilled knowledge of years of research and insight and costs just a few bucks. Why wouldn’t you take advantage of such a cheap, efficient way to learn lessons that could change your life without having to do the work or live the experiences the author had to bear?

Want to Live Longer? Change Your Mind About Aging

Typing in “longevity” into Amazon reveals over 40,000 books on the topic. Each author purports their own cure, typically involving a special diet, miracle supplement, or painful practice. However, there is one often overlooked factor that studies have found increases lifespan by seven years or more.

How to Overcome Anxiety Forever

Winston Churchill predicted three to four million people might be forced to flee metropolitan centers after the first bombing raids of WWII. Tens of thousands of police officers were requested to prevent the stampeding exodus from trampling one another… Yet these predictions were wrong.

Referent Power: The Ultimate Form of Influence

Forget prestige and corner offices, forget gentle parenting—the real power of effective leaders and parents is their behavior. It’s no secret that our behavior influences those around us. It gives us the power to make a difference—to influence the behavior of others and shape environments.

Studies Show Self-Compassion is the Motivator You’re Missing

Pushing ourselves and holding ourselves accountable are how we achieve success. Unfortunately, many of us mistake harsh self-criticism and self-castigation for “pushing ourselves.” And that has the opposite of the desired effect.

How to Banish Virtual Meeting Boredom

It’s one thing to eliminate distractions in meetings. It’s another to do the same in virtual meetings. Now that virtual teams are becoming a norm, many coworkers have never met each other in person. Yet, they’re expected to work every day toward a shared goal.

Limiting Beliefs: Ditch the 4 Dream Killers Holding You Back

You’re probably not going to fulfill all your goals this year. And if you don’t, it likely won’t be because you’re incapable; it will be because you got in your own way. A slew of self-limiting beliefs will distract you from your goals and New Year’s resolutions. Below are four ways you’re likely to shoot yourself in the foot with self-limiting beliefs, plus ways you can learn to get out of your own way.

Sales Psychology: Why You Make Terrible Buying Choices

Did the load of gift returns you made in January make you realize that you need to be a smarter shopper? During the holidays, we’re bombarded with ads and sales pitches that use psychological tactics to grab our attention. These messages make it tough for us to make smart shopping choices.

Listening to Fitness Gurus is Making You Fat

You could feel the excitement buzzing through the WhatsApp channel. An A-list fitness guru reportedly spending millions of dollars yearly to reverse aging was in town to hold an in-person workout. Without hesitating, I signed up. I was interested in seeing Mr. Guru in action and eager to be inspired by his approach.

The Magic of Now, Not How

Airbnb began as a weekend project when the founders sent an email offering their living-room air mattress to hotelless attendees of a major design conference. Facebook started when Mark Zuckerberg built a clone of ConnectU over the weekend and told everyone in his dorm about it. Most of us think we are never ready for what we want: being in a relationship, living in another country, or starting a business. But the best way to make it happen is to start immediately.

The App that Transforms Drinking Habits: a Case Study

As a child of two parents who both struggled with alcoholism, Nick Allen had a choice to make when it came to his own drinking. He could follow the same destructive path his parents took, or he could swear off drinking altogether. But for Allen, and millions of others like him, all or nothing wasn’t much of a choice. Instead, Allen found a third way and co-founded a multimillion-dollar company in the process: Sunnyside.

3 Steps to Master Your Emotions and Be Your Best Self

You won’t evolve if you ignore your emotions. Mastering them is the best hack for becoming your best self at work and at home. I discovered the power of managing emotions when I set out to find a cure for my chronic distraction. I was struggling to the point that it was affecting my relationship with my daughter: whenever we spent quality time together, I found myself fiddling with my phone, my mind elsewhere.

The Ultimate Guide to Unstoppable Motivation

The Pacific Crest Trail is renowned as one of the most arduous—and sometimes dangerous—hiking trails in America. Every summer, thousands of intrepid walkers set off on the trail, beginning in spring and knowing they won’t arrive at the Canadian border until five months later. For most people, this sounds like a hellish feat of endurance. For University of Missouri professor Kennon Sheldon, it sounded like a perfect opportunity for a psychological experiment.

Multitasking During Meetings? How to Make Your Colleagues Indistractable

When I moved from a Google sales team in New York City to a Google operations team in Boulder, Colorado several years ago, I expected to find differences in culture and team norms. But one particular practice took me by surprise. Multitasking during meetings was rampant. Everyone was so distracted. This became grossly apparent during my first presentation in my new role.

How to Build a Habit-Forming Enterprise Product

For companies building products for enterprise customers, increasing customer retention by just 5 percent increases profits by 25 to 95 percent. Yet keeping customers isn’t easy. Eighty percent of B2B buyers say they switch suppliers at least once in two years. User retention is perhaps the most important metric for SaaS providers, who offer products or services that must engage customers regularly to ensure they don’t churn.

Score Your Spats: How to Stop Fighting in a Relationship

I got this message from Shane Parrish: “Oh I meant to tell you… I remember something you told me that I now share with everyone. It’s made a difference for so many.” The “something” he’s referring to is a simple question that my wife and I have posed to each other throughout our 22-year marriage. We’ve been using this method for so long, I assumed it was common practice. Here’s the gist: Whenever you have a disagreement with someone you care about and who cares about you, pose this straightforward question…

Unlocking Focus with the Distraction Tracker

Think you’ll explode if you try one more ineffective productivity hack? Here’s what you need to know to actually hack back distraction: there are only three causes of any distraction: an internal trigger, an external trigger, or a planning problem. A distraction tracker is the only way to help you figure out which of those is causing you to get distracted so you can do something about it. Download ours here.

The Crucial Difference Between Distraction and Diversion

Because I write about distraction and how to avoid it, I often get asked the question “Aren’t distractions sometimes a good thing? Don’t we all need some distraction in our lives?” Nope!

Decoding Self-Serving Bias: A Spy’s Guide to Clear Thinking

One Sunday morning early in my career, I arrived at work to find a colleague of mine already there. We were working on a critical piece of software for an upcoming covert operation. He approached me shortly after I sat down at my desk. “That code you were writing was supposed to be done two days ago,” he said. “The operation is tonight, and we can’t go without you. You’ve put the whole thing in jeopardy.”

This Meeting Could Have Been an Email: Top Tips on How to Have Fewer Meetings

We’ve all been in a dumb meeting—one that makes you think, “This doesn’t even apply to me,” “I’m learning nothing from this,” or, worst of all, “This meeting could have been an email.” I’m sure you’ve commiserated with colleagues over what a time suck dumb meetings can be. Still, you might have resigned yourself to dumb meetings, accepting them as an inevitable facet of the workplace. But dumb meetings are not inevitable; they’re totally avoidable.

When Do You Feel Most Creative? Why Ideas Bloom at Bedtime

More times than I can count, I’ve slid under the bedsheets, turned off the light, and shut my eyes…only to have a great idea pop into my head. I’ll toss and turn for a while, hoping I’ll forget the thought. But if it’s a good one, I’ll turn on the light and, eyes bleary, scribble it down.

32 Morning Affirmations: Rise & Shine! [Science-Backed]

Even if you’re not sure about the power of morning affirmations, the science behind them is: When used correctly, self-affirmations can significantly affect your mindset and behavior. They have the power to rewire your brain, helping you break free from negative thought patterns and instill healthier habits.

Scheduling for Life’s Surprises: When Timeboxing is Toast

Some days, the world seems intent on sabotaging your timeboxed calendar. A meeting goes longer than expected. The daycare center calls to say that your child is ill and has to be picked up ASAP. A project you thought would take an hour to complete instead took three. Before you know it, the end of the day arrives, and you’ve barely given time to the tasks you had wanted to do. But what can you do? Some events are just outside your control… right?

Messaging App Madness: How To Stay Productive [and Sane]

When they came on the scene in the 2010s, enterprise messaging apps delivered the fast collaboration companies craved. A new world of internal messaging dawned in which anyone could ping anyone and get a near-immediate response. But in offering a potent solution, group messaging apps also introduced a problem: constant distraction at work. We’re drowning in notifications that lure us to diversion and degrade productivity.

How to Build an Irresistible Product for VC Investors

Venture capital (VC) is a great opportunity for new entrepreneurs seeking to bring a product to life—but the funding is incredibly difficult to secure. A survey of almost 900 VC firms found that they consider 101 opportunities on average for every deal they close. Still, the benefits of VC funding are clear.

You Don’t Have to Follow the Same Routines Forever

Numerous articles detail the routines of the most successful people in the world: Apple CEO Tim Cook wakes up at 3:45 a.m. and exercises. Actor and producer Reese Witherspoon eats the same healthy breakfast. Society has become so focused on increasing productivity and packing the most into every day that we think of long-term, consistent routines as the gold standard for spending our time.

You Can Have Your Retirement Fantasy Today

Imagine your retirement. Are you picturing long, lazy days on a tropical beach under coconut trees? Maybe you’ve opted for a life of adventure, traveling to all the places you haven’t been to yet. Perhaps the science fiction novel you’ve always wanted to write is finally pouring out of you. But why should you wait until you retire to pursue those things?

How to Craft an ‘Indistractable’ Summer Schedule for Your Kids

The end of the school year is a magical time. Kids have made it through a grueling year of groggy early mornings, rigid class schedules, piles of homework, and endless extracurriculars. Finally, they have two whole months of sunny freedom. It’s a well-deserved break. But this gift of time can easily be squandered.

The 4-Day Workweek: How To Do More With Less

What would it look like if the world moved toward a four-day workweek? Time magazine says 2023 could be the year of the four-day workweek. But if the world is going to attempt this paradigm shift, we have to do our best to eliminate the obstacles. Companies and employees can use the methodology described in my book, Indistractable, to navigate this sea change.

Managers, Stop Distracting Your Employees

It’s no secret companies spy on their staff. The rise of remote work has made corporate leaders paranoid, thinking they must monitor their employees’ every digital move. When employees know their performance is being measured by the rules of productivity software, they become motivated to prioritize emails and messages over their core work. Discover better ways to tackle distractions at work.

Here’s How I Made the Time to Write 2 Bestselling Books

So you want to write a book. Awesome! If you’ve made attempts already, I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that writing is hard work. I’ve written two books and countless articles, and it wasn’t, and still isn’t, easy. I wrote my second book, Indistractable, about controlling your attention and choosing your life because I had such a hard time fighting distractions. Indistractable is my living proof that you can write a book—even if your life is hectic and focusing seems impossible.

A Case Study in Implementing the Hooked Model: Gatorade’s Gx App

When I was younger and involved in competitive sports, I had access to resources, including trainers, to help me understand what I needed to do to improve my performance. Now that level of guidance is hard to find without shelling out beaucoup bucks to hire a personal trainer.

Money Buddies: Don’t Go It Alone with Your Wallet

Now, more than ever, we have to be smart with our money. Yet navigating our personal finances and adhering to a budget can be a daunting task. However, there’s a free and fun technique that anyone can use to get back on track with their finances: getting a money buddy.

5 Productivity Myths Ruining Your Life

Every time I hear a productivity myth described as fact, I cringe as if listening to a snake oil salesman peddle his cures. Let me tell you, when I was writing my second book, Indistractable, I endlessly researched productivity and time management. I tried a lot of recommended methods and techniques myself. Some of them can be so incredibly helpful in controlling your attention and managing your time. But 5 productivity myths are holding you back.

How to Stop Habits that Secretly Make You Miserable

You wake up in the morning irritable and groggy but determined to be productive. Yesterday didn’t go well. You didn’t complete even the one big priority project that would have taken just a couple of hours if you’d focused. Still, you spent all day on the computer, even leaving your partner to handle dinnertime alone and canceling pickleball with friends. And for what?

One Question to Ask Yourself to Know Your Future

The German writer and philosopher Goethe believed he could predict someone’s future based on one simple fact. “If I know how you spend your time,” he wrote, “then I know what might become of you.” Seeing how you spend your time reveals your values and, thus, shows where your investment of time, attention, and effort will lead you.

Make Time for Procrastination

If you haven’t finalized your New Year’s resolutions, consider committing to binge-watch a show on a regular basis.Okay, it doesn’t have to be binge-watching. Another guilty-pleasure-esque activity works, too. Perhaps your preferred procrastination is jamming to ‘80s music videos on YouTube or browsing Amazon for new gadgets. Whatever it is, set aside time for it and do it.

People Make Time for What They Want — Rightfully So

People make time for who and what they want, and you should, too. Though the author is unknown, this saying has become an axiom to soothe distraught thoughts. Some use it as reasoning to understand why another person isn’t making time for them.

Kickstart the New Year with a Self-Audit

As New Year’s Eve approaches, so does the customary exercise of introspection and self-reflection. The practice of examining ourselves can be a powerfully healthy one. Done correctly, it leads to self-awareness, which increases our ability to exercise control over our emotions and provides a greater sense of well-being. But done incorrectly, self-reflection can go awry.

’Tis the Season for Reexamining Your Values

How will you spend your precious time in the coming year? As one year ends and another begins, many of us won’t help but reflect on who we are and who we’d like to become. Most people aiming to emulate their ideal selves will resort to New Year’s resolutions—but more often than not, those are doomed to fail.

4 Mental Traps That Kill Productivity

Productivity has many enemies: too many meetings, external triggers like interruptions from coworkers, whether virtual or in person, and multitasking the wrong way, to name a few. But more often than not, it’s mental traps that trip us up.

Labeling Yourself is Keeping You Down, Do This Instead

Recently, after I gave a virtual presentation on my book Indistractable, a listener wrote something in the Zoom chat that drove me bonkers: “This is great but wouldn’t work for me. I’m a Gemini.” Insert face plant.

Not Enough Hours in the Day To Slay Your To-Do List

Even the most productive person can’t have it all. At least, not all at once. You can search for the best productivity apps to make you more efficient and focused. You can implement productivity hacks and cut distractions. But you still might feel like there simply are not enough hours in the day for everything you need to get done. Something has to give. Read on for a simple strategy to identify and honor your priorities.

3 Reasons Why Subscription Businesses Fail

Subscriptions are hot (and not). Companies and investors love subscription business models since they generate recurring revenue that translates to predictable cash flow. The more money a company is likely to make in perpetuity, the higher its share price.

Skip the Digital Detox—Abstinence Won’t Work (But This Does)

I once tried a digital detox. It failed miserably. When I realized I was distracted during quality time with my daughter, I blamed my smartphone and made some extreme changes. One might think, given all the bad press about so-called “smartphone addiction,” that using no technology would be the right cure.

The Surprising Science of “Manifestation”

Manifesting is bull. There, I said it. According to Oprah, manifesting is bringing something tangible into your life through attraction and belief—i.e. if you think it, it will come. It encourages people to bring a goal to life by making vision boards, writing in manifestation journals, chanting positive affirmations, and speaking it into existence.

Best Productivity Tools: 6 That Stuck With Me

Since writing Indistractable, I’m often asked what tools and apps I personally use to get the most out of my day. But after years of research into the psychology of productivity, focus, and the causes of distraction, I’ve learned that there is no one magic tool. Rather, the best tool is the one you’ll actually use,which is why I only rely on just a few to be at my best.

Schedule Maker: a Google Sheet to Plan Your Week

Many people bristle at the idea of using a schedule planner. They don’t want restrictions and prefer the freedom to tackle things as they come up. While an open day is wonderful on a vacation when you have nothing to do but relax, vacations eventually end. In the real world, there is work to finish, people to meet, and a family to nurture. When we don’t plan time in our day to do what really matters, our life quickly falls out of balance.

A Fail-Safe Trick in your Search for the Right Productivity Apps

The internet is inundated with articles that have titles like “The Best Productivity Tools of the Year” and “Productivity Apps That Will Make Your Life Easier.” Dozens if not hundreds of apps claim to help people focus, manage their time, and stick to healthy habits.

You’re Not Addicted to Technology. Here’s What’s Happening Instead.

The loudest voices in our culture today say yes. During a conversation about technology on his mega-popular podcast, Joe Rogan said, “We’ve got a real addiction problem in this country.” In a congressional hearing in 2021, U.S. representative Kathy Castor of Florida said that apps are “designed to be addictive.” During his 2020 presidential campaign run, Andrew Yang said, “Our kids unfortunately are getting addicted to smartphones.”

Locus of Control: How It Affects Your Life and How To Manage It

My daughter had just pulled the caramel corn out of the oven, and the sticky-sweet smell was almost irresistible. Despite knowing it wasn’t going to help my diet, I was gnawing for a taste. But instead of kindly asking for a small bite, as I should have, I barked, “Damn this caramel corn!”

Distraction at Work Is a Symptom of Dysfunction

It seems we’re all checking our phones constantly these days. But all that time spent on our phones leaves little time for anything else. We need time to think in order to come up with novel solutions to our business challenges.

27 Best Productivity Hacks & Tips That Actually Work in 2024

Got a few minutes? Then why not use them to implement these quick fixes that cut distraction and aid productivity? I uncovered these productivity fixes while researching how to combat distraction and increase productivity for my book Indistractable, and I’ve relied on them ever since.

Why Values In a Relationship Are What Make It Last (Or Not)

You don’t have to agree on everything, but you do have to be aligned. Divorce sucks. My friend is going through one right now. The worst part is that he saw it coming. And he’s not the first of my friends to tell me they ignored the warning signs of an eventual breakup. Although there isn’t a surefire way to predict which relationships will last, there are some guidelines anyone entering or in a committed relationship should be aware of. They involve having honest discussions to make sure you’re seeing eye to eye with your partner about hot-button issues.

Why People See Problems Where There Are None

Our baseline dissatisfaction is what motivates us, but we must harness it correctly. Do you often experience a strange malaise, that feeling of blah-ness you can’t quite explain? The good news is you’re not alone. You may be surprised to learn that, although people don’t often admit it, everyone’s default state is dissatisfaction; it’s how we evolved.

3 Ways to Filter Your Friends

When it comes to friendships, quality matters more than quantity. Thirty-six percent of Americans say they are “seriously lonely.” For many people, the solution may seem to be to go out and get more friends. Yet one study shows that when it comes to friendships, less is more. But how do you decide which friendships to invest in and which to let go of?

How Products Shape Our Mindsets and Change Our Reality

When I first started using the Strava app, my weekly running mileage skyrocketed. Nothing had changed other than my perception of how much running was “enough.” Lots of people in my feed were clocking 40 to 60 miles a week, and suddenly my 20-mile weekly average seemed negligible. Here’s how the products we use can shape our perception of reality and, as a result, change our actions and lives—all by leveraging the much-studied yet still mysterious power of mindsets.

How to Prevent Burnout

Discover 21 ways to prevent burnout and recognize when to seek professional help. Take proactive steps to maintain your well-being.

Fear of Being Alone is Natural. Embrace It.

Are you afraid of being alone? Well, you’re not alone in that. In a 2014 survey of 2,000 adults, one in three said they fear being alone: 40% of women and 35% of men. Ironically, the more we subvert quality alone time with distraction, the more we cripple our capacity for being alone—and stoke our fear about it. Giving in to fear of being alone perpetuates a cycle of loneliness.

Get Comfortable With Being Uncomfortable

Humans have an evolutionary need to be challenged—to feel discomfort. We may not enjoy whatever discomfort we expose ourselves to in the moment—be it a physical, mental, or spiritual hardship—but doing so is key to personal growth and even just plain contentment. However, if we’re to take that first step outside of our comfort zone, we have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Surprise! There’s a Right Way to Multitask

Everyone knows that multitasking destroys productivity, right? Haven’t we all seen studies and read articles telling us that it’s impossible to do two things at once? In some ways, that’s true. Lucky for you, I developed a method to multitask the right way. I call it “multichannel multitasking.”

Can Someone with ADHD be ‘Indistractable’?

Does my book Indistractable work for the ADHD brain? It’s a question I’ve been getting a lot lately. Though I didn’t specifically write the book for people with ADHD, I wanted to get an honest opinion from an expert. I reached out to Caitlin O’Brient Bauer, who was diagnosed with ADHD at age 8 and is now a certified ADHD coach.

Planning a Vacation Is Practice for a Great Life

When I was 13, my parents and I went to Europe on vacation. It was miserable. My father wanted to hit all the major sites, while my mother just wanted to relax. Because they couldn’t agree on what to do, none of us got the vacation we’d hoped for.

Why It’s So Hard to Shake the Way People Make You Feel

Good or bad, our feelings color how we see people. In psychology, a “trapped prior” is a perception of reality that’s colored, or trapped, by past experiences. If not treated, trapped priors can turn into debilitating phobias.

Don’t Write About What You Already Know — Instead, I’m “Writing To Learn”

For me, writing is a wonderful way to go deep on a problem I’m struggling with. As my friend and fellow author, Gretchen Rubin told me, “Research is me search.” When I’m struggling with one thing or another, my first step is to think through the problem myself. But there are still problems so tricky that they take even more thinking through.

Are We Really Having Fun at Bars or Just Escaping Reality?

For many people, bars and booze serve as the original Tinder or Grinder, a socially acceptable way to shop for a mate. But not everyone in a bar is on the prowl. Some will tell you they go out for drinks to just unwind and have fun. That’s certainly true, but is there a deeper reason?

The 6 Behavioral Design Books That Paved My Career

I’m surprised I ended up an author. I’m dyslexic, English is not my first language, and writing was always my worst subject in school. Just as surprising as my unlikely path are the mix of books that got me here.

The 4 Steps to Becoming Indistractable

Overcoming distraction is the struggle of our time. Here are 4 simple steps to manage your wandering mind.

Why You’re Never Going to Be Satisfied With Life

Why are we perpetually restless and unsatisfied? The truth is, we’re not wired to feel content or satisfied. Here’s why that’s a good thing.

How a Morning Brain Dump Helps You Stay on Track All Day

Even when something is weighing on your mind, taking a minute to write it out can help you get the most out of your day. Here’s how…

The Key to Behavior Change is Identity Change

One of the most effective ways to change your behavior is to change your identity. I don’t mean joining the CIA or a witness protection program, or adopting an alter ego. I mean, rather, changing the way you see yourself.

How to Make Sure Working From Home Doesn’t Mean You’re Always Working

When large swaths of the U.S. population transitioned to work from home in March 2020, they lost that critical physical boundary between their work domain and other life domains. As a result, those facets of life have bled into each other, with work often taking precedence.

Planning Ahead Is the Key to Living With More Spontaneity

It seems counterintuitive, but spontaneity can’t happen without a bit of advanced planning. Only people with spare time can be spontaneous.

To Fix Your Problems, Find the Root Cause

Do you play pool? I sure don’t. But I know enough about the game to use it as a metaphor for the hidden reasons we don’t do what we say we will.

One Question to Help You Get More Done

It was 9 a.m. and Wendy, a freelance marketing consultant, knew exactly what she needed to do for the next hour: be in her office chair to write new client proposals, the most important task of her day. As she held her coffee mug with both hands and took a sip, a fantastic addition to the proposal entered her head. “This is going to be great!” she thought to herself. But before she had a chance to write down the idea — “Ping!” Her phone buzzed with a notification.

The Pursuit of ‘Flow’ Is Overrated

The idea of flow is considered by many to be the epitome of productivity. Also known as “being in the zone” or “hitting your stride,” flow captivates us with its promise of becoming so absorbed in what we’re doing that we tackle tasks effortlessly. That magical zone is great when you can find it. But what happens when you can’t?

How to Survive in a World of Information Overload

We live in a world of too much information, and it’s nothing less than a blessing. Throughout most of human history, access to knowledge was limited. Power equated to how much information you had access to. Kings built great libraries, and texts were rare and valuable things. Today, however, what was once scarce is abundant. We’re drowning in information.

How to Get a Friend to Put Away Their Phone Without Being a Jerk

Are we ever exclusively in our friends’ company? Our phones are almost assuredly present and ready to interrupt us with a poorly timed notification. Who hasn’t seen a friend divert their attention, mid-conversation, to reflexively check their phone? Most of us simply accept these interruptions as a consequence of our times. But there’s something you can do about it.

How to Tame Your Wandering Mind and Actually Get Some Work Done

You have a big deadline looming, and it’s time to hunker down. But every time you start working, you find that, for some reason, your mind drifts off before you can get any real work done. What gives? What is this cruel trick our brains play on us, and what do we do about it? Thankfully, by understanding why our mind wanders and taking steps to deal with distraction, we can stay on track. But first, let’s understand the root of the problem.

If You Don’t Plan Your Time, Someone Else Will

Most people are stingy with their money and generous with their time. We cut coupons, split checks, and debate whether we should buy a 99-cent app. However, when it comes to our time and attention, we give it away to anyone who wants it without thinking twice.

You Don’t Need a Mentor. You Need a Buddy.

When you’re struggling to achieve your personal or professional goals, do you ever wish you could speak with a famous mentor? If only you could connect with a super successful business leader like Jeff Bezos or Meg Whitman, then you’d have the answers you’re looking for. Surely they’d point you in the right direction, right?

Would You Rather Give Up Sex or Your Phone?

Every night, my wife and I engaged in the same routine: She put our daughter to bed, brushed her teeth, and freshened up. We both slipped under the covers, exchanged knowing glances, and started doing what comes naturally to a couple in bed: we began to lovingly caress our gadgets — she fondled her cell phone, while I tenderly stroked the screen of my iPad. Ooh, it felt so good!

Habit Tracker Template in Google Sheets

Many people strive to improve themselves in one way or another. Whether it’s getting more sleep and exercise, or spending more time doing the things we love, our ideal selves drive us to be better. They symbolize our belief in our own potential to live in alignment with our values. The drive to improve is also why strategies and tools that enable us to track our behaviors are so potentially gratifying. It feels good to see ourselves moving closer to our goals.

Here’s How to Ensure Your Kids Don’t Spend the Entire Break Staring at Screens

It’s that time of year when kids have a long break from school and parents and guardians likely have some time off work. What will we do with all that free time?

I Changed My Mind About Saying “Merry Christmas,” and You Should Too

In fifth grade, I was the only Jewish kid in my elementary school class. This was the 1980’s in Central Florida and even though it was a public school, unaffiliated with any church and funded with taxpayer dollars, my teacher taped a poster to the wall in her classroom that read, “Jesus Is The Reason For The Season.” The Christmas specials on TV said Santa visited “all the children in the world.” The good ones got gifts. The naughty ones got lumps of coal. The Jewish ones got told Santa wasn’t coming to their house.

How the Ancient Greeks Beat Distraction

Distractions seem ubiquitous today, but they’ve always been a part of human life, even going back to Greek mythology. Here’s how to resist them.

Habits Are Overrated

These days, when someone says they want to form a “habit,” what they often mean is that they want to make drudgery effortless. That is, they don’t want to actually do the work, rather they want to have done it—past tense. The trouble is, trying to build a habit is often a self-defeating trap.

Need Motivation? Make a Price Pact

Probably the only research paper I’ll ever call “delicious” is one called, “A Tale of Two Pizzas.” In the study, researchers offered one group of people plain pizzas, plus the option to add ingredients for an additional charge. To a second group, they offered topping-loaded pizzas, with the chance to remove ingredients and pay less. Same thing, right? Of course, not…

Researchers Say We’re Trapped in a “Cycle of Distraction.” Here’s How to Break Free.

Let’s say you’re on a diet. You’ve cut calories and avoided junk food like a champ. But now you’re faced with a powerful adversary: chocolate cake. You somehow muster the strength to resist, but as you exit the kitchen, you can’t stop thinking about the chocolatey goodness you could’ve enjoyed. Abstinence can often backfire.

The Pinky Promise: Stick To It – Or Shed Some Blood

A pinky promise is a surefire way to make you do what you say you’ll do. People have a long history of breaking promises, to themselves and to others. For as long as people have been squelching on their commitments, they’ve tried to come up with ways to keep them. Consider the pinky promise.

Self Discipline and Self Control: Secrets of Reaching Your Life Goals

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